12th Week Weigh-In

Hi ya'll! Well, yesterday was my 12th week weigh-in! I still cannot believe it was just 12 short weeks ago when I decided to change my life for the better. I was sick and tired of being the fat chick. I was tired of being embarrassed for myself and my family.

I've never really talked about the embarrassment that goes along with being overweight. For those of you who may have a weight problem of your own, I'm sure you can understand what I'm about to say. One of the most embarrassing things about being obese is trying to find a chair sturdy enough to hold me. Whenever I enter into a room my eyes immediately begin looking for a chair I think will support my fat butt. The chair not only has to be sturdy, it needs to be a chair without arms. I cannot remember the number of times some skinny waitress, receptionist, etc. has led me to a seat that is obviously not going to support me. Are these people daft? Or do they just not have any sense? Or do they just not realize I'M FAT?? It is SO embarrassing to have to tell some size 2 waitress that I don't think the chair she has led me to will support my weight. Then she gives me a look of wide eyed ignorance.....like she's totally oblivious to what I'm saying. Occasionally I just don't say anything, but try to test the chair before I actually sit down on it. I try to gauge how sturdy it is, which is not a very fool proof method of testing it until I actually sit down. J is always aware of my problem. He usually will stand up with me until I feel like it's safe to sit. The other patrons in the restaurant (or wherever we may be) all seem to take notice. I think I've noticed some offsides betting going on as to whether my fat butt will land on the floor or not. There's definitely been some elbow nudging going on as people watch the fat parade try to land safely.

Even at work I have this same dilemma. When I first started working at my current job, I was shocked and horrified to see the chairs I was expected to sit in. The chairs themselves are fine for the drone work I do, but they have arms. However, the arms of the chairs can swing out to accommodate my behind. Of course, when walking up behind me it looks like I'm trying to take flight. The wings (arms) of my chair spread wide.

One of the most embarrassing things that has ever happened to me involved sitting my obese behind in a less than capable chair. It was right after I had given birth to my son, A. He spent an entire month in the neo-natal ward in Children's Hospital in Oklahoma City. J and I were living in a motor home (courtesy of my in-law's owning a RV business) on the grounds of the hospital. I was stitched and sewed up in places you don't want to know or even think about....and NO I did not have a C-section. Anyway, needless to say I was sore. At the time I gave birth I weighed about 328. J, my mother-in-law, and I had gone into the cafeteria to eat breakfast one morning when it happened. The chairs at the table were the old, metal, folding type chairs. I found a chair and sat down. Well, immediately the chair gave way and I found myself sitting on the floor. Now just imagine a 320+ (I assume I lost some weight from giving birth!) pound woman, stitched up the middle, sitting on the floor. How does one even go about helping such a person? Well, obviously no one had a clue because no one came to help. (Of course, no one knew about my stitchery, except for J and S (my mother-in-law). There were a bunch of people in the cafeteria all just sitting with their mouths opened, looking like they were waiting for the momma bird to feed them. So, they all just sat, stared and gasped. But, no one offered to help me up....except for my family. J is really thin and his mother is really little. (No offense S, but I could sit on you and no one would ever know what happened to you!) Plus, I won't tell you how old S is....let's just say she is old enough to be J's mother, but she's not in the best of health herself. Anyway, here are these two poor souls trying to help me off the floor. I was totally humiliated. I momentarily forgot about the pain ripping through me and I tried to get up as fast as I could, which was probably not very fast....all things considering.

The reason for all of my ramblings today?? I am so excited. For the first time ever, or at least since I've been working at my present job, I am able to sit in my chair without swinging the arms of the chair open wide! WooHoo! I know it's not impressive to most people, but it thrills me! I no longer look like I'm about to take flight!

Also, I just had the first person, who was not told about my dieting, to acknowledge my weight loss! A co-worker of mine mentioned I had really lost a lot of weight. I was more than happy to tell her how much I had lost whether she cared or not....she was going to listen and pretend to enjoy it!

Now for my 12th week weigh-in results..............

..........DRUM ROLL PLEASE..........

I lost another 1.50 pounds this week! Yay me! That brings my total weight loss to 37.75 pounds! I now weigh 309.25! I only need to lose another 10 pounds to get under 300! I know I will make it before the end of the year! I need to lose another 28.25 pounds to reach my second mini-goal. At that time I will weigh 281. (That is less than what I weighed when I married J in 1994!)

I had J take my 12th week progress pictures last night. I didn't have time to post them, due to it being so late last night. However, I promise to post them tonight. I can really see a difference when I'm standing in the photos. Nevertheless, in the pictures of me sitting I still look HUGE! I don't see a difference in those pictures AT ALL! I will post them though and you can see for yourselves. Oh, you know you want to look!

Have a wonderful day!